9 Tips For Surviving The 4th Trimester

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It has happened a number of times during my past two pregnancies. A student will ask me how many months I am (they do not know to ask in weeks), I will respond with something like, “Seven,” and they will say, “Only two to go!”

Then I burst their bubble.

“Three to go. Pregnancy is actually 10 months.”

The girls look horrified and the boys look confused. Whoever did the math on 40 weeks being nine months is very seriously mistaken.

I feel the same way when talking about trimesters. The first trimester is known for being the time when we feel the worst as our bodies adapt to growing a human. The second trimester is when our energy comes back and we feel fine. The third is when we feel large, excited, nervous, and uncomfortable all at the same time.

But no one talks much about the 4th trimester. At least not in mainstream discussions.

You can read the William’s birth story here and Zoey’s here.

The 4th trimester is the three months after the baby is born when your hormones are completely out of whack, sleep is non-existent as you keep your tiny human alive, and your hunger is raging. Not to mention the more graphic parts of recovery from the physical birth of your child, the fourth trimester can arguably be the hardest.

So let’s talk about it more. Let’s recognize the fact that we not only just created a human, but we brought them into this world, and now we are continuing to keep them growing and thriving. With how attached newborns are to their mothers in the beginning, it sometimes feels like they are still part of us.

I did a lot of research before Zoey was born on the best way to care for an infant and myself in those early weeks of life. With William, I reflected a lot on what those days were like with Zoey in order to prepare. These are my top nine tips for making the 4th trimester as easy as possible since learning the ropes of caring for an infant can take up so much time on its own.

Stock Your Freezer

Before both kids, I spent a weekend cooking. While it was tiring to get it all done in the third trimester when your feet hurt, your back aches, and you would rather be sitting, Rob and I were both so thankful to have a freezer stash of meals we could choose from when days got crazy. This is especially true with William’s arrival as we navigated both a toddler and a newborn.

Do One Small Task

While I did not find the newborn days to be difficult mentally, they were a struggle physically. From waking up at all hours of the night, poor posture from breastfeeding around the clock, and general post-birth recovery I was not always motivated to do much else. Giving myself one small thing to accomplish in the day apart from feeding the baby gave me a sense of accomplishment. For instance: cleaning one bathroom, running the dishwasher and putting everything away, doing a load of laundry including folding and putting away, or sweeping the floors.

Talk to People

It can be hard to leave the house in the beginning, which is fine. Do not feel pressure to get out the door before you are ready. However, to avoid the feeling of isolation, talk to people. That could be texting your siblings, calling your parents, or getting active on social media. Whichever way works for you, having a community of people to reach out to (especially during those 2 am feedings) can make you feel more connected.

Keep Taking Your Prenatal Vitamins

Besides stocking the freezer and continuing to use my belly butter, this was probably the best postpartum advice I received. With how little sleep, how hard it is to eat quality meals, and how busy we are as new moms, continuing to take a powerhouse vitamin is essential. I noticed a huge difference in the days I forgot to take it versus when I did for my mood regulation and exhaustion levels.

I used the Nature Made PreNatal with DHA and really liked them. Yes, they are large, but did not upset my stomach or leave me feeling burpy.

Find Products That Work

When Zoey stopped breastfeeding at three months, it was like a switch flipped and my hair started falling out. Not in giant clumps, but in amounts large enough for me to worry if I would have any left. Finding a hair loss product that worked well and did not add to my limited shower and grooming time helped once my hormones regulated. There are also some quality biotin vitamins you can use to strengthen your hair if it still feels weak and thin.

Continue to Use Your Belly Butter

Thankfully, I do not have any stretch marks on my stomach from pregnancy. William left me with a deep purple two inches that have now faded and Zoey left me a Linea Nigra that faded after about a year. Sure having good genes is part of that, but so is my religious use of the Burt’s Bees Mama Bee Belly Butter. Once the babies arrived, I started using the cream to help avoid stretch marks during engorgement. No one tells you how much stretching your breasts do in the 4th trimester!

Eat Enough

Having a busy toddler and a hungry infant around made it almost impossible for me to sit down to a meal during the day. The only way I could get in enough calories was to graze on snacks I could eat in a quick handful without a utensil. Snacks that saved me during the day were:

• trail mix
• apple slices
• green muffins (from the pre-baby freezer meals list!)
• berries
• string cheese or baby bells
• almond joy bites (also a pre-made freezer snack)

• baby carrots
• Little Nut World Peanut Butter packets (Zoey loves these also.)
• RX Bars

Have a Sense of Humor

When the baby poops so hard that is lands across the rooms. When you forgot to put on nursing pads and leaked through a shirt. When you realize you have been wearing your pants backwards all day. When the sheets are soaked from night sweats and milk. Laugh. Smile. You will look put together again at some point, but this is not that day. Keep a sense of humor and it will make these embarrassing moments seem that much less horrifying.

See where I was at four months postpartum with William. 

Give Yourself Time

Just like you know your body needs time to grow a human, and you might have to give up some of your favorite things (like distance running and heavy lifting for me), you are going to have to continue that grace in the 4th trimester. Do not stress about getting back to the gym as soon as possible, but move your body in ways that feel good. Walks, gentle yoga, and pelvic floor strengthening can keep you moving and getting endorphins while you wait for your exhaustion to subside.

Newborn Items We Love

• Baby Bjorn Bouncer
• Bebe Au Lait Nursing Cover
• Ring Sling 
• High Absorbency Burp Cloths
• iPlay Baby Hats 
• Glider and Ottoman
• Play Mat
• Boppy 
• Bottle Drying Rack
• Freezer Meals

Breastfeeding Items I Love

• Bebe au Lait Nursing Cover
• Lansinoh Hpa Lanolin 
• Boppy Nursing Pillow
• Lansinoh Disposable Nursing Pads
• Nalgene Water Bottle (Narrow Mouth)
• Seamless Nursing Cami
• Medela Tender Care HydroGel Pads
• Nursing Sleep Bra